29 July 2016

Single Mother In Search of a Partner? Awareness is Vital to Your Success

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Single mothers who wish to find a partner with whom to develop a serious and successful relationship need to be aware of their expectations and needs and share these with the prospective partner. If he will do likewise they increase the likelihood of becoming able to develop and nurture a satisfying intimacy.

With the new world-wide sociological-cultural trends, as gay marriage and children’s adoption by married gays and lesbians, more and more highly-educated women opt to have a child without a partner. Although most of them would have wanted to have a father for their children, they don’t seem to be successful at developing a long-lasting relationship with a man. One reason being, that there are still quite a few number of men who prefer their women to have less education than them, while the highly-educated women prefer men with equal or higher education to theirs.

Studies show that most women who opt to have a child on their own are not only highly-educated, but also have a well-paying job, both of which give them the feeling of independence. Due to the seriousness of their decision, most single women take a year and a half to finalize their decision about becoming a mother. Indeed, they would have preferred not to be a single mother, but in the absence of a “suitable partner” they opt to go ahead with artificial insemination. 

Many of the single mothers still wish to have a partner to share their life with. They know that, now that they have a child, it might not be easy for them to be attracted to a man. The man, on his part, might know that the single woman might be too engulfed with taking care of her child and that it might come at the expense of being attentive for him and to their relationship.
When a single mother and a prospective partner begin dating, feeling they’d like to develop an intimate bond, both need to be aware of the relationship they are upon to enter. Open communication, sharing of expectations and understanding each other’s perception of reality is an essential part in their attempts at building a satisfying intimacy. Being aware of doing things with the child as well as by themselves is another component of the relationship which determines the success or failure of their bond. 

The beginning of their relationship – like so many others – is often not an indication as to how things between them will develop in the future. As much as they might “fall in love” and move quickly into an “intimate relationship”, they might need to keep in mind that due to the special situation they are in they need to take things slowly and think carefully about their next move and steps. They need therefore to be attentive to their individual needs and wishes as well as to their partner’s. After all, getting into a relationship where a small child is involved is not like entering just any other relationship between two adults. 

The more the single mother is aware of her expectations (as well as fears) about a partner, and the more the man who gets involved with her is aware of his own expectations and fears; and the more they are open to share their respected “piece of mind” with each other, the better equipped they are to develop a satisfying, enduring intimacy.

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Guaranteed Breakup Advice to Pull You Through Troubling Times




Breaking up is always difficult.  What you need is guaranteed breakup advice to help you pull through the days and weeks following your breakup. While this is not a one size fits all solution by any means these steps will provide you some degree of comfort despite your heartache. They may even give you a little bit of hope for the future. You'll have to make that decision for yourself though. 

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Don't Get Angry with the World
The world is going to keep turning despite your broken heart. It will do no good to get angry at the world. More importantly, staying angry really doesn't accomplish much at all. It takes so much energy and effort to maintain and is rarely productive. Instead, try keeping your chin up and fostering a positive attitude. It may take a little more initial effort but positive attitudes are contagious and if you infect everyone around you it will be much more difficult for you to remain angry.

Take Back Control of Your Life
There's nothing like putting yourself in the driver's seat again to give you a strong sense of empowerment. When you are dumped or someone breaks up with you it feels as though the power in your life has been taken away from you. Start with small things to put yourself back in control. Take classes. Learn new skills. Get a new job. These small things you can do will make y\u feel much more in control of your own destiny.

Figure out why Your Relationship Failed
Taking the time to learn what went wrong can help you prevent making the same mistakes in future relationships. It might take a little while to get to the real heart of the matter but it's an effort that will be worth its weight in gold and effort when future relationships benefit from this newfound insight.
A little hint you might find useful is this: few relationships end for the most obvious reasons. You'll probably have to dig a little bit to find the real reason for the breakup.

Consider Getting Your Ex Back
Sometimes there's nothing in the world that will take the place of getting your ex back for healing your broken heart. Some relationships are just impossible to move on from. Decide now if that is the only solution for you so you can begin making plans for a future or whether it's time to move on and seek new relationships.

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The Main Reasons Why Men Cheat

Men cheat. Women cheat. People cheat. It’s true. The question many of us have is, why?
So what is the MAIN reason men cheat?
The answer may surprise you. Most women assume men cheat because of sexual attraction – but in fact, they don’t. According to studies of men who have cheated in serious relationships or marriages, they cheated because they were emotionally dissatisfied in their relationships. An overwhelming majority were feeling underappreciated and emotionally disconnected from their partner. This can be an underlying feeling that’s been happening over time, or it can be sudden.
This isn’t to say that sex doesn’t play a role AT ALL in men’s infidelity. Sex is an integral part of a healthy relationship, and for that reason if a guy is in an emotionally satisfying relationship that’s sexually deficient, it’s likely he’ll look for it elsewhere.


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So how physical was it?
Of course, when someone engages in a physical affair they’re most likely attracted to them. However (and again somewhat surprisingly), in multiple studies almost 90% of men surveyed who had cheated did NOT describe the woman they cheated with as being more attractive than their partner.


When does it happen?
Another reason men cheat is to get affirmation that they’re still desirable to the opposite sex – and not the person they’re in a long-term relationship with. Harmless flirting is fine; but when a man is insecure enough about his waning mojo, he’ll seek out women outside of his relationship to confirm he still “has it.” (Of course there are also men who simply enjoy the art of sneaking around, and we hope you stay far away from that type of guy.)


And where do most men meet the women they have affairs with?
Many men who begin to feel underappreciated at home seek out admiration and respect in the workplace. Often these flirtations start out as emotional connections and then progress to the physical. When men have trouble talking with their partners or feel as though they’ve lost a spark in their relationship (mental, physical or otherwise), it’s easy to lean on female acquaintances and friends whom they’re around most often: from 9 to 5.


Other influences that cause men to cheat?
These include getting an extra thrill, being around friends who have also or are currently cheating on a spouse or partner, and feeling as though their partner has changed. If a man feels like his girlfriend or wife has become less caring or has stopped being romantic, it can cause him to seek affection from other women. If she’s vastly different from the girl he feels he fell in love with, he’ll want to find what he used to have with her…somewhere else.


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Ways You Can Reduce Your Man Becoming a Cheater

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Cheating sucks.   So what are three ways you can reduce the likelihood your man turns into a cheater?

1. Don’t lose sight of your well-being/health
Being in a long-term relationship can create a sense of comfort, which is great! But make sure you don’t get too comfortable. For instance, don’t quit wearing make up altogether or make your daily uniform sweatpants and an old tee. Of course this is a completely appropriate outfit for a night in with your guy, but dressing up sometimes will help remind him of your femininity and beauty. Keep your fitness and diet regimen the same as when you two got together!
Just because you’re committed to each other, it doesn’t mean you should stop caring about your waistline or your overall general health. Keeping this up will also help keep your confidence up–and that’s one thing that all guys can agree is HOT.


2. Keep communication open
If you’ve found that something seems odd or missing, it may be time to open up the lines of communication, a la “Hey babe? I noticed we haven’t been doing our regular date night for the last few weeks. How do you feel about renewing that tradition?” This is an example of a nonconfrontational way to rejuvenate the romantic (and important) part of your relationship.
Accepting that you’re both “busy” or that maybe this is just a phase doesn’t cut it. Turn up the volume on your voice and say what you need to say. It’s better to step out of denial and into a solution so you can give your relationship a chance to change and grow over time.


3. Along with the emotional part of your relationship, keep the physical part fresh!

Don’t let your activities in the bedroom get stale. Sometimes it helps to remind yourself and your man how fiery your chemistry was at the start of your relationship. Reenact one of your first dates, plan a weekend away, or settle in for a “stay-cation.”


Some of the best advice I ever got way back when was this: Never go longer than three days (yes, THREE) without having sex with your partner. Sure, you’re tired. And yes, maybe the garlic from dinner makes you feel less than pretty. So what?! We promise that once you get into the groove, your mind will tune into your body and a connection will be established. Busy lives can’t get in the way of maintaining a physical connection.


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20 July 2016

Looking For Love After Divorce? Don't Repeat Your Past Mistakes

Don't Repeat Past Mistakes. Follow These Three Tips
Looking for love after divorce? Here are three tips to help as you begin dating after your divorce.


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1. Be suspicious if it all seems “too good to be true” – it probably is.
If your subconscious, neurotic needs are running the show, it’s fabulous at first and then horrible. If your common sense is running it, it starts out tentative, and grows stronger when you meet the right person. If your friends are worried about this relationship, listen to them. They could be wrong, but what if they’re right? You need to find out.


2. You shouldn’t feel like you always know what to do. You and this new person are doing a new thing.
Seek to work as a team to figure it out as you go along. If either one of you is in charge, there’s probably a problem. If you’re working together, even though it’s not too smooth, it’s probably going OK.


3. Don’t keep secrets.
Talk about past relationship issues, and be willing to share your emotions and reactions with each other.  Getting to know each other is the key to developing a working relationship. Don’t follow some set of mental rules – they’re always a trap from your childhood – don’t repeat your early family. That style doesn’t suit who you are as an adult. Instead, seek to learn something new, about yourself and about each other. If you’re afraid that telling the truth will upset your partner, you need to test that right away, to find out if you can get through the problem. Screwing things up is the way to find out if you can fix them together.


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1 July 2016

Do Abandonment Fears Repeatedly Sabotage Your Relationships?

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Do you know that the fear of abandonment is a major impediment to ever having or sustaining a successful and healthy relationship? Do you know most people who find themselves unconsciously sabotaging their relationships harbour this fear deep within them? Do you know that this fear often arises from early negative memories of abandonment imprinted in the subconscious mind from early childhood?
Finally do you know that now for the first time in human history it is a) possible to completely and permanently delete/erase such memories and by doing so b) concurrently erase/delete the fear itself from within thereby eradicating the tendency to sabotage relationships based on this fear?

When one experiences some form of significant abandonment as a child the negative memory of the event becomes "downloaded" within the subconscious mind and recedes completely from the person's awareness. Its presence and effects however are not forgotten.
The person, without realising it often will feel themselves to be anxious, insecure, nervous, and vulnerable whenever an important person/partner/friend happens to leave or disappear even for short periods of time.
The person in question, will often become panicked, feel out of control, unconsciously resort to some form of needy, controlling, attention seeking or manipulative behaviour that will invariably create greater tension in that/those relationships thereby leading to a potential fresh abandonment experience/event.

Another way of saying all of this is that the original abandonment experience behaves like an unhealed wound that must be guarded from resurging into conscious awareness because the pain laden within it is too unbearable.  Unfortunately the tendency to ward off this event leads to a repeat of the very same event, further abandonment and further pain.  This can create an interminable spiral downwards into isolation, depression, panic and a life that feels overwhelming and intolerable.

The only way out of this downward spiral is the complete and permanent erasure/deletion of the original negative (and subsequent) memories of abandonment from the subconscious mind. Many might refer to this as the healing of the original wound but actually is more than that; it is fundamentally a profound empowerment phenomenon.
The erasure of these memories effectively leaves the individual feeling like the event never actually took place. Although this may be difficult to conceive and believe it is actually now a reality.
Consequently with such an erasure the person begins to feel whole, complete, strong, resilient, in charge of themselves, self confident, self assured, emotionally independent, self sufficient, clear, healthy and like their True Empowered Authentic Self i.e. the self "before" the event ever took place.

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